God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin. If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:5-9

            Many Christians find it troubling that they repeatedly deal with certain sins, and then it’s easy to begin doubting our salvation.  There’s a big difference between relationship (the unbreakable Father-child bond) and fellowship (our line of communication with the Father). Confession definitely plays a huge role in maintaining an intimate communication with the Father and our relationship with others.  But the believer’s standing as a child of God does not change.  Fellowship with God in interrupted by sin.  Psalm 66:18 says, If I had cherished sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened, but that fellowship is then restored when we confess and repent.  We are then, freed from the emotional bondage of guilt and shame as well.

            As we mature in the faith, the inclination to sin will decrease, but as long as our earthly life continues, we won’t be completely free from the desires of our sinful nature or from the attacks that come from the enemy (Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 1 Peter 5:8).  Our assurance (or perhaps reassurance) comes from Romans 8:1, Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus!

            There is something else to remember about forgiveness that we need to be aware of.  And that is that it is possible to extend forgiveness to another person and yet, still cling to resentment.  We may say everything is ‘ok,’ but our unpardoning spirit remains – and it will stay with us until we emotionally release the other person from the wrong (actual or perceived) he or she did.  Thankfully, there is a way to move on.

     – First, assume responsibility for our unforgiving spirit, and choose a change of heart toward the

       other person.  The healing process begins with repentance.

     – Then, release our hold over the debt we feel is owed.

     – Recognize that the other person’s violation (actual or perceived) has exposed an area of weakness 

       in ourselves – namely, our resentment and desire for revenge (or retribution or justice).

     – Finally, remember how often God forgives us.

            The Lord is grieved to see His children cling to an unforgiving spirit because emotional debt imprisons us. We become paralyzed by our own distrust, resentment, and insecurity, which only builds walls that shut out family and friends.

            In contrast, God’s goal for us is freedom from bitterness.  He wants to see us reconcile with our offender and even show tenderhearted and loving acceptance.  We have a calling from God to forgive.  Though it may be difficult at times, it is possible because Christ lives in us.

            We need to remember Paul’s words in Ephesians 4:26-32:

“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold…Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.